[This chapter is a reward for people who followed me, and not just my story. People on my mailing list have known about this story for a week, now it's your turn. I hope you enjoy it. I will not call out in my main story that this side-story exists ;)
This is a one-shot featuring Akane. It is a chapter that would be inserted into my main story, Hand-Me-Down Ranma — A Good Fit?, but since it is told from Akane's point of view, it can't be in that story, since that story is told 100% from Nabiki's point of view. Still, I thought this part of the story should be told, so I am publishing it. This chapter would go between chapter 56 and 57. I tried to make this able to stand on its own as a one-shot, but it really will make more sense if you read it in between chapters 56 and 57 of the main story ;)]

[Story Soundtrack: Secret Love Song by Little Mix, then You Don't Know My Heart by Rachel Platten, in that order]

Akane stepped softly up to the shattered doorway of her home and peeked carefully around the corner. Dad was marching up to Ranma and Nabiki and blocking their exit. She smiled hopefully at that.
Maybe Dad can get him to stay. If he forces her to stay, then he'll stay too. If he stays, then maybe ... maybe... She thought as she hugged herself with her right hand up on her left shoulder, and her left hand gripping her waist. She watched him carefully as he stood next to Nabiki and spoke with her sister and Dad. He was fixated on Nabiki. She didn't know what power her older sister had over him, but he seemed to be mesmerized. Isn't he? Is it something else? Is it just lust? She asked herself with disgust.
She wasn't disgusted with him, she was disgusted with herself. She had always prided herself on being strong, independent, and confident. That entire view of herself had been falling apart slowly since Ranma arrived, and it had started to unravel quickly when Nabiki accepted the engagement. She had started questioning what it was about her sister that had his interest so strongly. And, maddeningly, she kept coming back to Nabiki's body.
I'm just as attractive as Nabiki is, aren't I? She thought as she hugged herself even more tightly. I guess Nabiki is a little taller than I am ... and she has a somewhat bigger chest, but other than that, there isn't much difference, is there? She asked herself.
Stop it, all you're doing is driving yourself crazy. She berated herself. There's no way Dad's going to let them go out looking for fights right now, Dad will ... oh no! She interrupted her own thought process as whatever argument Dad had been having with Nabiki concluded, and Dad stepped to the side of the gate and bowed out.
What the hell did she say to him to get Dad to back down? She asked herself despondently. She froze for a moment, then slowly started to gather the courage to step out of the house and try to stop him herself. Dad was already walking away from them, looking defeated.
Ranma was splitting his focus to watch Dad and Nabiki. She could see, even now, the looks he was sneaking at her older sister. They were just little glances, but he kept doing it. He seemed to be so infatuated with Nabiki that he could barely take his eyes off her. He'd never, ever, looked at her like that, even at the very beginning.
It's now or never. If I don't try right now, I'm going to lose him. They've obviously made up about what happened yesterday. I have to try now, before it's too late. Whatever happens to them out there, I know they'll come back inseparable. She made up her mind and forced herself to step away from the safety of home and to walk towards them and called out to him to wait in a voice she hoped didn't sound as desperate as she felt.
You can do this, it won't be any worse than giving a speech in school or fighting Kuno. She tried to assure herself as she forced her shaking legs to step one foot at a time. He turned and looked at her with a casual smile.
"R-Ranma ... can I talk to you before you go?" She asked him as she watched him carefully for any signs that she still had a chance.
"Can it wait? We need ta go find the old ghoul and end this." Ranma replied. He seemed ... distracted. She wondered how much of his thoughts centered on Nabiki these days.
Nabiki was watching her guardedly. She knew that Nabiki was trying to be fair about this whole thing, but that her older sister was just as ... interested ... in him.
Still, he hadn't said he was done with her yet, he hadn't yet told her that it was over. She still had a chance ... right? Kasumi had said that Mom had said to act if one knew. She didn't know, but she couldn't be sure if she didn't try. And Nabiki had said that Mom had said to speak the truth, even if one's voice shook. So she tried to be brave and took the risk.
"P-Please ... Ranma? Please? Just a few minutes? If we don't talk now then..." She forced herself to say. It wasn't everything, but it was as far out on the limb with him that she had ever been. She didn't even care that Nabiki was standing right next to him and watching. But still, she couldn't look at him while she said it.
She looked up a moment later when he didn't respond right away, and she saw him looking over at Nabiki who sighed and nodded. Nabiki shot an exasperated look at her, but didn't say anything. That was probably good, because the way she was feeling, she knew her emotions were very near to the surface, both the good and bad ones.
Her mind flashed back to what Nabiki had said yesterday in her room. Nabiki was committed to him, she was sure of it. Nabiki had said what she'd said to him yesterday because she'd obviously been upset and scared, but he'd obviously forgiven her for it.
Ranma shrugged and nodded as he stepped towards her. As soon as he did she adjusted her stance so she could start walking with him and waved him forward to join her. She stepped next to him and started to lead him away from Nabiki. There weren't many places they could go, so she settled for just walking along the inside of the walls with him.
She knew she was running out of time. He was slipping through her fingers, and she didn't know what to do about it. She wasn't even sure if she should do anything about it.
He was so good with Nabiki, and Nabiki had changed so much since she had gotten involved with him. Ranma had forced her older sister to finally start to heal from Mom's passing. For that matter, Nabiki's healing had forced her own healing to start. She would never forget that.
Because of him, her family was starting to get better. Kasumi was still recovering, but she had a feeling that when she did, Doctor Tofu was going to try again with Kasumi.
The only downside to all of this is I may not end up with Ranma. She thought sadly as she looked at him. That hurt, she had to admit. He had been her first ... well ... everything. Oh, sure, she'd had a childish crush on Doctor Tofu before. But Ranma ... Ranma had been her first real ... was it love? They'd never called each other boyfriend and girlfriend. They had called each other fiancé and fianceé though, but generally only under duress. There had been times, though, when he had called her his fianceé when he hadn't had to. She had returned the favor on occasion.
She sneaked a look at him as they started to walk around the inner part of the wall, circling towards the back of the house. He was the first boy she had ever wanted to kiss, and the first boy who had ever held her in a romantic way.
She knew he had feelings for her too. Maybe she could ... still make it work? Maybe he was so attracted to Nabiki because Nabiki didn't fight with him, at least ... not like she herself did.
She knew that she'd started off on the wrong foot with him. She hadn't really known what else to do. Dad had sprung the engagement on her, and then her sisters had dumped him on her. Then she'd walked in on him in the bath, and gotten scared. Then he'd walked in on her in the bath. She'd been angry about that, and she'd done what she'd always done with boys who crossed the line with her concerning her body and personal space.
She knew she hadn't handled it very well. He hadn't been at fault at all the first time, other than not locking the door. And the second time hadn't been like he was watching her in the bath through the window or something, it had obviously been an accident. She had been angry about it, and she had fallen back on her usual way of handling boys. It had worked and kept him at a distance; it had kept her safe.
But because of that rocky start, their whole relationship had been doomed to follow a pattern of insults, teasing, anger, and childishness. She had always felt like he had been playing with her, and she knew that at least on some level she had been playing with him. She couldn't speak for him, but most of the time there had been no real anger behind her arguments with him. To her, it had been somewhat... fun.
It seemed to her that they both had hidden their feelings behind their fighting. She had always thought ... that at some point, after enough time ... they would have stopped their fighting, and let their feelings out.
I was waiting for him to go first. She realized. I thought I had ... more time. But I still have a little bit more time, don't I? She thought resolutely as she looked at him again. I still have a chance. I can go first, can't I? I can tell him how I feel, maybe ... maybe there's still ... time. She thought as she walked next to him.
She glanced sideways at Nabiki as they began to round the corner of the property. She saw Nabiki watching her carefully. Her older sister looked more vulnerable than she could ever remember her looking.
I'm sorry, Nabiki ... I have to try... she thought as they walked out of her sister's view. She looked around at their property and smiled ruefully. It wasn't like they were actually alone. There were soldiers up on their walls. Dad was standing up there with them at one corner of the property. Ranma's Dad was on the opposite corner, and Doctor Tofu was up on the roof.
She knew all of them would be watching her and Ranma together. Watching ... always watching. That had been part of the problem the whole time Ranma had been engaged to her. There had been that constant pressure from their parents to get together. Both of them had resisted that pressure just on general principle, if for no other reason.
She slowed her walking speed once they passed the corner Dad was standing on. Dad had looked down at her briefly, and smiled at her, then resumed watching over the walls for the Amazons.
In a way, the Amazons were a blessing in disguise. They were enough of a threat that their parents' attention was focused almost exclusively on them. That left the complicated relationships she and Nabiki had with Ranma in free play. Whatever happened next, it was going to happen because of what she and Ranma and Nabiki decided, not because their parents were pressuring them.
She sighed and tried to calm herself down. Her heart was hammering in her chest. She was so nervous she felt like her legs were going to shake out from under her. She was actually worried that if they stopped walking, she'd simply fall down.
Stop it! It's now or never. Nabiki isn't backing down. She's pushing hard for him, and I think she almost has him. He spent the night with her last night. Doctor Tofu told me she'd asked for him, that she'd wanted him and only him to help her last night when she was hurting. Nabiki's already committed to him, I know it. He's going to respond to that. If I don't ... if I don't tell him how I feel, today ... her thoughts trailed off as she shut her mind off from the disturbing images that appeared in her imagination of her alone at home, with nobody to love her.
She knew plenty of the guys at school lusted after her, most of them, actually ... but she didn't think anyone in the school, or even in town, actually loved her. She wasn't even sure if Ranma did, but she was pretty sure he did.
She bit her lower lip almost to the point of making herself bleed, and reached a shaking hand out to him. It was almost the mirror image of what he'd done on their date. She closed her eyes and prayed he wouldn't ignore her.
A moment later she felt his warm hand slide into hers. She gasped softly as the connection between them was made. It felt like electricity to her. She glanced over at him with her eyes barely open, and tried to calm herself down. She felt herself slowing down even more, until she was just standing there under the trees behind the kitchen at the rear of their property.
He looked over at her in momentary confusion, then slowed to a stop himself so that their connection didn't break. She could feel her hand still shaking in his. He obviously felt it too, as he squeezed her hand momentarily and rubbed his thumb along the back of her hand.
It was little things like that ... he'd never done things like that before he had gotten involved with Nabiki. It was things like that which made her doubt that she should keep pursuing him. But, she had to try one last time. She felt things surfacing inside herself that she knew she had been fighting since he'd shown up at their house. It was time to let them surface.
I can do this! If I can learn how to break a brick with my bare hand, I can say a few words to Ranma. She encouraged herself.
Her little pep talk didn't seem to have any affect on her body though. She felt her legs giving out under her. Her whole body was shaking now. She was experiencing competing strong emotions of the fear of losing him, her nervousness about talking about such things, and her attraction to him.
"Can we ... can we sit down for a bit?" She asked him.
He nodded and started to lower himself to the ground. He started to release her hand, but she squeezed harder to signal to him that she didn't want him to. He didn't say anything, but he did re-grip her hand again softly as he sat down. She tried to mimic his graceful motion, but ended up mostly just sinking to her knees, then slumping to the side so she was resting partly on her hip and partially on her bottom, while also somewhat sitting on her own legs.
She looked up briefly at the sunlight streaming down through the leaves of the trees above them. It was a beautiful day. She ignored the soldiers on the walls, the smell of smoke in the air and the threat of the Amazons that smoke represented, and tried to just focus on the moment she was sharing with him.
She pulled in a slow, calming breath and lowered her eyes to his. She found him looking at her with a mixture of curiosity and concern. She was pretty sure she could see affection in his eyes too, maybe even something stronger.
I'll never know unless I ask him, right? She thought to herself as she smiled softly at him and gathered her courage to start down a path she'd never gone down with anyone before.
"Ranma ... do you remember the time we fought together against Azusa and Mikado?" She asked him quietly.
"Oh, you mean those ice skating weirdos? Didn't they call themselves the Golden Pears or somethin' goofy like that?" He asked nonchalantly as he put an arm behind his head casually and smiled.
"Yeah ... them..." She said as she returned his smile. He was so ...disarming... in a lot of ways. There were so many guys in her school who would be behaving much differently if she had asked to walk alone with them, and to sit with them holding hands in the trees behind her house.
They would be tripping over themselves trying to be polite to her, and trying to show her how smart they were, or trying to show her that they were rich, or they could sing, or whatever trait they might think would give them a chance with her ... not Ranma though. He just leaned back, propped his hand up, and talked with her.
It was true that he lived with her, and they were very familiar with each other ... but even when he had just met her, he'd acted that way. He'd been slightly more polite when he'd first arrived, but other than that, he'd always just been ... Ranma.
There was nothing fake about him. He wasn't putting on an act for her, she didn't have to try to figure out what kind of person he would be if they got together and got serious. She knew exactly what kind of person he was. What she couldn't seem to figure out, was how to make herself admit to him how she felt.
Is it just because I'm being childish? Do I only want him so strongly now because Nabiki wants him? Is he just a toy I didn't want until someone else started playing with him? She asked herself sternly. She didn't think that was what she was feeling, but she honestly didn't know what to think about anything concerning him anymore.
She glanced at him wistfully and sighed as she looked up into the trees again. She had kind of always thought that she'd had all the time in the world to figure it all out. She'd thought that the relationship could develop on her terms, in her own time. He was living with her after all, and it had seemed like there had been no rush to get serious. Aside from maybe Ukyo, there had been no other serious competition for him, and he hadn't shown any strong preference for Ukyo as a romantic interest.
He obviously preferred Ukyo's cooking, but as for a romantic partner, he had always been unreadable about his longterm desires. But, regardless, even if he had shown a desire to be with her ... she hadn't wanted an arranged marriage, and he hadn't seemed to want one either. She hadn't wanted to trap him into a marriage by rushing into anything. She suspected he had been doing the same thing.
Both of them had known that if either of their fathers had any suspicions of true feelings on their part, that they would have been hustled off to be married soon after that. She didn't want to be married to ANYONE like that, even Ranma. She wasn't even willing to marry him in a loveless marriage just to join their schools and keep their family promises. Maybe Nabiki would be willing to do that, but she wasn't.
If I get married, it is going to be for love, and only for love. It will be to the guy who I know is the guy for me. All those thoughts, and more, flashed through her mind as she continued the conversation she'd started, while she continued to stare into the canopies of the trees.
"Do you ... do you remember what you said during the match, what you said to Mikado?" She whispered to him.
She could feel herself starting to blush. Normally she wouldn't bring something like this up, but she knew she was almost out of time. She could tell that he was getting close to making a decision. She didn't know if Nabiki was pushing him to make one, or if he had just decided it was time, but she did know that she was about out of time.
Why did I spend so much time talking about meaningless nonsense on our date? She chastised herself. She had been so nervous on their date that she'd barely spoken to him for the first half hour or so. He'd finally asked her if she was mad at him, because she was being so quiet. 
She'd responded to that by babbling about anything she could think of that was a safe topic. She'd talked about school, and Kenpo, and current events, and even Kasumi's cooking. He'd jumped into the conversation almost with relief. After that the date had passed almost in a blur as they kept up a steady stream of chatter to cover up the nervousness they both had seemed to be feeling.
I could have at least asked him if it was his first date, or if he wanted to go on another date. I could have asked him SOMETHING personal, maybe something like what he'd like for his birthday. I mean, he didn't ask me anything real either, but ... damn it! ... WHY IS THIS SO HARD?! She screamed inside in frustration.
He looked over at her and squinted. She could see him trying to figure out if she was talking about something real, or just mundane stuff about the fight. She looked down so she didn't have to look into his eyes as she tried to summon the courage to push a little further.
"You know, when you told Mikado not to try to kiss me..." She whispered hesitantly. She closed her eyes briefly and willed herself to calm down. She imagined water washing over her, and that her body was gently bobbing in the current of the water as it pushed and pulled her gently in its cool embrace. A moment later she exhaled softly and pulled her eyes back up to his as bravely as she could as she regained a bit of her composure. She found him smiling at her nervously.
"Yeah, I remember." He said softly. It was his turn to look at his feet awkwardly. She smirked a little inside to see him struggling too.
"W-why ... why did you say that?" She asked him gently.
"What do ya mean?" He asked carefully.
"You could have just told him not to try to kiss me. You could have said he was being rude, or creepy. But ... you didn't. You said ..." She trailed off, embarrassed.
"I ... I said ... you were my fianceé." He whispered.
She smiled without looking at him, and nodded. "You did. We barely knew each other then, but you still said that, in front of all of those people..." She said weakly, still without looking at him.
You claimed me ... YOU CLAIMED ME in front of SO MANY PEOPLE ... you didn't say it was our parents making you do it, you didn't call me uncute ... you said I was yours ... so much so that you'd kill anyone touching me! But you never said anything like that TO me ... you just said it ABOUT me ... she thought with panic in her heart. She felt like she was losing him. It seemed like the person he had been when he had claimed her, wasn't the person he now was. And it seemed like the way they had felt then, wasn't quite the way they felt now.
Maybe if I remind him of our past together? She thought as she searched her mind for a way to confront the problem she was facing. She wanted him to remember the good times they'd had together. She wanted him to remember the things he'd done for her, and what she'd done for him. She knew it was kind of cheating to bring up her past connection with him, but damn it, if Nabiki was pulling him into her bed to sleep together, the least she could do was remind Ranma of the special connection he shared with her.
She wanted desperately to say what was in her heart to him, but she was struggling to say it to his face. But maybe ... maybe she could jog his memory of what they'd meant to each other. Underneath all of their childishness had been a real connection; it is a real connection, she corrected herself. She didn't know if it was love, but it was something and ... it's all I have left. She thought resolutely.
"I remember." He said softly.
She smiled at him. "You protected me during that fight. You let him throw you into a wall hard enough to shatter the wall, just to protect me from falling. You fought for me, and you even did it knowing the prize of the fight was p-chan, and I know you don't like p-chan." She said in a quavering voice.
He nodded at her, but didn't say anything. She wasn't asking him any questions, she was just stating facts.
She sighed inwardly, and kept pressing. "Do you remember when Ryoga first showed up in town, and that huge fight you two got into?" She asked him.
He smiled at that. "Yeah, I remember. That guy has always been a loose canon, hasn't he?" He said patiently. She could tell he wasn't sure why she was bringing up the past, especially with Nabiki waiting for him, but he seemed to be willing to hear her out.
"You protected me then too. You were still too new for me to really understand you or what was going on, but looking back on it ... I know I must have seemed ... really ungrateful ... for what you did for me..." She whispered as she looked down at her knees.
"Oh ... hey ... don't worry about it, Akane ... I didn't say what I shoulda either. And ... I mean ... you did get caught up in the fight, and it had nothin' ta do with ya. You even tried to help me." He said kindly.
She looked up at him and smiled weakly. "I did. Not that it did any good. All I ended up doing was tripping and making you have to protect me from the stuff Ryoga was throwing." She said carefully as she remembered his warm arms around her as he'd saved her from the razor sharp throwing bandannas. He'd been a girl at the time, but he'd still been Ranma.
"Yeah ... and you ended up gettin' your hair cut because of all that..." He said just as carefully. She could tell he was starting to catch on to what she was doing.
"And you fought for me when I asked you to in the Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics tournament. I know the real reason you did it was to try to make Kodachi go away ... but still ... you did it because I asked you to." She said in a voice that was slightly more confident now.
He nodded and smiled at her. "Not that it did any good. That crazy chick can be clever with words when she wants to be. I bet she'll be a lawyer someday." He said ruefully.
She laughed softly and squeezed his hand. "God help us all if Kodachi gets access to the legal system." She said warmly.
It's working .... IT'S WORKING! She thought excitedly to herself. He was opening up to her. I just need to keep pushing ... keep reminding him of what we have together... she thought resolutely. "And then Shampoo showed up..." She prompted him, to see if he would pick up the topic on his own.
He smiled at her. "Yeah ... I never would have guessed she would follow me here all the way from China. Those Amazons are ... stubborn, aren't they?" He said warmly.
When he didn't add anything else, she tried to steer the conversation back on track. "Yeah, and Shampoo attacked me ... and you protected me." She whispered gently as she locked her eyes with his.
She saw him swallow nervously as she brought the topic back to where she wanted it. She could tell he knew what she was doing now. But he seemed to be trying to steer the conversation away from the more ... intimate ... details of their past together. But she had to keep pushing for him to talk about them. It's now or never. She thought as she waited for him to respond.
He looked down for a moment and ran his free hand through the grass idly. When he looked up again, he had an unreadable expression on his face. "Yeah, I did. I couldn't let her attack you. But man ... I wish I hadn't knocked her out. If I hadn't done that ... none of this would be happenin' right now." He hissed through clenched teeth.
She smiled at him. "If you hadn't done that, I might have been hurt." She said gently as she squeezed his hand reassuringly.
He looked into her eyes, and smiled teasingly. "Aww, c'mon, Akane, a strong macho chick like you? Getting hurt? That doesn't seem likely."
She looked down at that and sighed. She knew he was just trying to lighten the mood, but it was that mentality he had about her that was part of the problem. Not that my own damn pride has been any help, at all. She reminded herself. She looked up at him again, and opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. She shut her eyes briefly, and imagined herself in the cool and calming water again. She kept her eyes shut as she finally managed to get the words out. "I...I'm not always as strong as I wish I was..." She whispered.
She looked down at her knees again and slowly let her eyes open again. She didn't feel like crying, she just felt ... vulnerable. She had given him an opening for the kind of teasing he always did. But she was being serious right now. It would hurt ... a lot ... if he threw what she'd just said into her face in the form of an insult. She waited for him to respond almost holding her breath.
He finally did respond in a slow, puzzled voice. "W-why would you say that? You're strong, Akane. I mean, you're not as strong as some people, but nobody is. Heck, the old freak's stronger'n me ... for now." He said in a kind voice.
She squeezed her eyes shut briefly as relief and joy washed over her. He'd said the right thing! She looked back up at him and smiled more broadly at him than before, and kept pushing. "Do you remember kissing me the first time we found out about your cat-fist thing?" She asked him earnestly. It was almost impossible for her to keep her eyes on him now, it was so embarrassing, but she made herself do it.
"Well ... no ... but I remember you telling me about it." He said softly. His eyes slid away from hers and to the tree behind her. She could tell he was embarrassed too.
She smiled. "I'm sorry I hit you ... I didn't ... I didn't understand what it..." She tried to say.
He looked back into her eyes for a moment and then nodded slowly. He didn't say anything, but she knew what he wanted to say. Then he surprised her by bringing up some of the points she had yet to bring up. "Yeah, and I fought for you when Ryoga learned the Breaking Point technique, and I did my best to protect you from the Old Freak when he showed back up in town. We certainly get a lot of weirdos in this town, don't we?" He asked her with a smile. She couldn't tell if he was trying to hurry her up, or if he was genuinely getting into the spirit of what she was trying to say.
"Yeah, we do. Do you remember that huge guy who was going around challenging dojos and collecting signs?" She asked him.
"That guy calling himself the Dojo Destroyer? Yeah, I remember him." He said calmly.
"That was the second time we ever fought together ... it didn't go very well at first..." She said carefully.
"Yeah ... I remember." He said somewhat glibly.
"But ... in the end ... you came back for me ... and you fought with me to help defend the dojo, and to protect my family's honor." She said as she felt her affection for him surge inside herself. She'd never really sat down and thought about all of the stuff he'd done for her and her family over the time he'd been around ... but it had been a lot. Sure, they had fought a lot during a lot of it, but the bottom line was that he'd always done what he could for her and her family.
"Yeah ... I guess I did." He said with a soft smile.
"Do you remember our ... our second kiss?" She asked him softly. She managed to keep her eyes up and on him as she asked him, and so she got to see the annoyance in his eyes, which was what she had been hoping to see.
"That wasn't a real kiss." He protested. "You used tape."
"Well, we were on stage with the whole school watching us, Ranma." She said teasingly. "And ... as I recall, I asked you if you wanted to try it again without the tape, and all you did was fall off the fence." She said with a soft smile.
He looked at her and glowered for a moment before he broke down and smiled. "Yeah, you're right. I guess I forgot about that." He said.
"You've done a lot for me and my family." She said softly to him.
"Yeah? So what? You've done stuff for me too." He said kindly.
"Not like you have, Ranma."
"That's not true. Don't you remember when the Old Freak made me weak with that stupid Moxi-bustin— whatever it was?" He said with an edge of anger in his voice. She knew he wasn't mad at her, but at the memory of being made weak.
She smiled softly at him. "I remember." She said warmly.
"I didn't want you to see me when I was weak." He said in a surprisingly mournful voice. She nodded, and let him continue. "But you tracked me down anyway while I was trainin' to beat the Old Freak with the Hiryu Shoten Ha." He said softly as his eyes defocused. She could tell he was reliving the memories in his mind.
"I did." She said carefully. At the time she had been mostly just upset that he'd gone out to train and left her behind, but he'd taken Ukyo. Looking back on it, it made a certain amount of sense though. Ukyo could cook better than she could, and he wasn't ashamed to be weak in front of Ukyo ... not like he'd been ashamed in front of her anyway. The thought of what that meant about his feelings for her made her feel warm inside.
"You were willing to set yourself on fire just to help me train." He said in an amazed voice as he looked at her with an unreadable expression on his face.
She grimaced. "That wasn't ... what I was ... trying to do, Ranma." She said, embarrassed.
"I know. But still, that was incredible. Nobody has ever done anything like that for me before to help me train." He said softly.
"Oh Ranma..." She said softly as she looked at him through half closed eyes as her breath quickened in her chest. All she really seemed to have succeeded in doing was jogging his memory of their past together, and making herself ache for him even more strongly.
"And then, you actually jumped into the tornado to get the chart for me ... I mean ... Akane ... that was so dangerous ... I still can't believe you did it." He said softly.
She smiled at him. "I did it for you, Ranma. Because you were so miserable being weak." She said just as softly. "I ... I didn't care if you were weak." She said in a whisper so small, it was almost unheard. He heard though.
He focused more strongly on her, and squeezed her hand gently, and nodded. "I remember. I was gonna leave and go try to find a way to get stronger, but you wouldn't let me go alone. You were gonna go with me to help carry my bag ... and stuff..." He said in a tone she couldn't quite read. She didn't know if he was embarrassed, or confused, or something else. "But the Old Ghoul managed to figure out how to fix it, so there was no need to go after all." He added with a happy smile.
"I ... I would have ... I really would have gone with you." She said sincerely as she squeezed his hand gently in return.
"I ... I know you would have." He said softly. Then he looked hard into her eyes for a moment. "Akane ... what's this all about, why're ya wantin' ta talk about this right now?" He asked in a voice that she could tell was accepting, but didn't understand what she wanted.
"I just wanted to tell you, Ranma ..." She said in a shaking voice.
"Yes?"
"I ... I want..." She tried to say, but the words just wouldn't come.
"Yes, Akane?"
She closed her eyes and smiled softly. She couldn't bring herself to do it. Nabiki had been right yesterday. It was true that Nabiki had been hiding from her emotions. But, as for herself, she couldn't bring herself to say what was in her heart — not to him anyway, at least ... not right now. She was going to have to work on that about herself. She sighed and smiled at him.
"I want to tell you, that I appreciate you, Ranma." She whispered to him. It was part of the truth. It wasn't what she really wanted to say, but it was the best she could manage in the moment.
He looked at her hard for another moment, then nodded hesitantly. "Oh ... I see, thanks. I appreciate ya too, Akane." He replied carefully. She rolled her eyes inwardly at him.
"Thanks ... Ranma." Was all she said as she tugged on his hand to rise. "We should probably get back to Nabiki..."
"Hang on a minute." He said in a firmer tone, as he pulled on her hand gently and plopped her back down to the ground. She looked over at him in surprise as she sat back down.
"Y-yes?" She asked him.
"Was that all you wanted to say?" He asked with a note of curiosity in his voice.
"Well ..." She said softly.
He just look at her expectantly. She couldn't look at him while she tried to summon the courage to say what she wanted to say. She looked at her knees again and tried again to say what she wanted to say, but she just couldn't. So she tried a different tactic. "Do you ... do you remember when you grabbed me in the hedge maze last week, when you thought I was Nabiki?" She whispered to him.
"Yeah ... sorry about that." He replied in his own whisper.
"I asked you if you wanted to be engaged again..." She whispered even more softly. He didn't say anything to that. He was probably nodding, but she didn't dare risk looking at him to find out. She pushed onward before she lost her nerve. "Y-you told me you'd think about it..."
"I did." He said in an unreadable tone.
"Have you?" She asked softly.
"Y-yeah, I have."
"Well?" She asked after a long pause.
"It's ... I dunno ... I'm engaged to Nabiki now ... but I was engaged to you ... it's all just ..." He said in a heavy voice, she could tell he was conflicted.
"What are you going to do?" She breathed in a whisper almost inaudible.
"What ... what do ya think I should do, Akane?" He asked her in a fragile voice. There was absolute silence between them for a moment and all she could hear were the birds in the trees above her, and the wind in the leaves around her.
She forced herself to snap out of it a moment later and looked up sharply at him while she locked her eyes on his. She pulled in a strong breath at what she saw in his eyes. She could tell, with absolute certainty, that he cared for her. She could see it in his eyes. What she didn't know, was how much he cared for her. "I ... I think ... you should do ... what makes you happiest." She said at last.
She wanted to be selfish and tell him to pick her, but she couldn't do that to him or Nabiki. Hell, she couldn't do that to herself. If he picked her because she'd asked him to, but his feelings for Nabiki were stronger, then she would be condemning him to be unhappy for the rest of his life! And ... that would make her unhappy.
"I ... I don't want stuff to change at home." He added in a shaking voice as he looked away from her.
It warmed her heart that he thought of her house as his home. "Kasumi says sometimes life forces change, even if we don't want it." She said softly as a tiny smile etched the corners of her mouth upwards.
"Yeah ... but if I don't make a choice..." He said in a hopeful tone.
"Then the choice might be made for you, Ranma ... and you may regret not making the choice yourself." She said gently. She was essentially quoting exactly what Kasumi had told her the other day, but it fit the moment, and he didn't know she was quoting Kasumi.
"I don't want people ... to be hurt. I want the family to stay together. I want everyone to ... I don't want ... anyone to leave." He said in a quavering voice as he looked into the treetops.
"Oh ... Ranma." She said softly as she watched him carefully. He was a guy she could see herself ... spending her whole life with. He was loyal, and sincere, and he cared about people. He was unbelievably rude sometimes, and quick to take offense, and he was uncultured. But she honestly couldn't say some of those things didn't apply to herself as well.
An impulse seized her then, and she smiled as her heart rate climbed even higher. What have I got to lose? She asked herself as she scooted closer to him.
He looked over at her as she scooted next to him so she was side-by-side with him. She looked around quickly, and decided that the trees provided enough privacy. She couldn't see any of the soldiers, and most importantly, Dad, watching them.
She was close enough to feel his body heat now. He was always warm ... most guys were. But, for some reason, it seemed special from him. Sharing his body heat with him was a pretty intimate thing to be doing with him.
He looked at her and raised an eyebrow and waited for her to explain herself.
She smiled bravely at him as she readied herself to go as far as she absolutely was willing to go at the moment.
I'm afraid. She thought as she looked at him.
Why is that? She asked herself.
I ... don't know. Am I afraid of him, of myself, or ... something else? She wondered as she looked into his blue eyes and lost herself in them. She forced her pride to back down, and dragged her willpower strongly forward in her mind. It felt like she was trying to reach into one of those plastic bags filled with water that goldfish came in. She pushed in her mind until she felt her mental hand break through the barrier and into the warm water waiting beyond.
She couldn't keep herself from inhaling sharply as she surprised herself with the depth of her desire to try one more time to connect with him. She was pushing herself past a lot of the rules and defenses she had setup to protect herself.
She let the warm water of her desire to connect with him fill her up as she imagined herself in the cool river again, floating in the pure and gentle current.
She closed her eyes and leaned closer to him and whispered into his ear. "There ... was ... a third time ... we kissed." She forced herself to say.
"When?" He asked just as softly.
She kept her eyes closed and breathed her answer into his ear as softly as she could while still making sound. "...Now?" She whispered hopefully.
She kept her eyes closed and waited. This was it, it was as far as she was willing to go to show him how she felt. They had almost kissed for real, on their own in the dojo after Mikado Sanzenin had kissed Ranma's girl form. But they had both chickened out, and neither of them had said the right things. And, of course, the family had decided to be creepy about it and to watch them while they had struggled to do it.
Please ... oh please... oh please ... she chanted to herself. It would hurt, a lot, if he stormed off and rejected her right now. Even a chaste kiss on the cheek would be better than being outright rej— 
Ranma moved. He shifted his body next to hers so he was sitting facing her, instead of facing in the same direction as her. She felt his body heat move closer to her and a moment later she felt his arm tentatively reach up and rest on her left shoulder. They both tensed at that for a moment. She reacted first, and leaned gently against his arm as she nodded firmly while she kept her eyes closed. He had permission, he just had to take it.
"You ... you sure about this...?" He whispered. He didn't sound very close to her.
She nodded again firmly and waited, still with her eyes closed. She heard him shifting around next to her, but he didn't kiss her. Her heart was hammering in her chest, and she felt physically weak, like she was in danger of passing out.
After another few moments had passed, and he still hadn't kissed her, she cracked one of her eyes open and found him doing essentially what he had done the time they had almost kissed in the dojo. He was leaning towards her while up on his knees, with his left hand clutching his knee while his right hand remained on her shoulder. But ... he was staring down at the ground and not moving.
Yet again, the way he behaved surprised her. Any other guy in her school would not only have taken the invitation to kiss her immediately, but they would have tried to do as much more as they could have gotten away with. She didn't know if he had ever kissed Nabiki, but she suspected he had. She had never actually kissed him — although they had come very close to it several times on their date. The time he was freaking out thinking he was a cat hadn't counted, and obviously the time she had blocked him with tape hadn't counted either.
Damn it, if Nabiki is going to take him, I am going to at least kiss him for real once! She berated herself.
She willed herself to lean in and kiss him, but her body didn't obey her. She closed her eyes and breathed in deeply and again imagined herself in the cool and calming waters. It wasn't helping anymore. The waters felt warm now, they were matching the heat of her own embarrassment, and something else inside her which felt hot, uncomfortable, and wonderful at the same time.
She smiled at herself and sighed inwardly. She couldn't really blame him for not having the nerve to kiss her, if she couldn't bring herself to do it either.
Do it, you coward! Fight! Kasumi told you to fight, even Nabiki told you to fight. THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE! If you don't convince him, RIGHT NOW, to come back to you, you will lose him forever! She screamed at herself as she closed her eyes and tried to suppress the urge to hyperventilate.
She could feel Ranma tense up through the connection they shared as he gently held her shoulder. She knew he could read her emotional states. She tried to force herself to calm down.
"It's okay ... Ranma ... if you don't want to..." She whispered softly. It was a way out. If he didn't want to, then—
"It's not that, it's just..." He replied just as softly.
She smiled and nodded. She understood what he was trying to say. She felt him shift his position. She didn't know what he was trying to do. He might have been leaning in to kiss her, he might have been trying to stand up. She didn't care.
She lashed her left hand up and grasped his hand gently but firmly and kept it on her shoulder. At the same time she forced herself to lean in and wrapped her right hand around the back of his neck. As soon as her hand found its mark, she pulled him in strongly towards her.
She was using all of her senses, except her sense of sight. She was finding she could force herself to do a lot more things with him, so long as her eyes weren't open.
He didn't resist her as she pulled him towards her. She thought about pausing and waiting to see if he would kiss her now that she had taken some initiative, but her body was kind of moving on its own at the moment. She wasn't sure she could have stopped herself if she wanted to.
She felt it when he reached the point where she pulled him off his balance as his hand on her shoulder shifted from barely resting on her, to putting some of his body weight on her. The rest of his body weight shifted down and to her right side where he had probably put his hand down on the ground next to her. The heat of him was almost right on top of her now. She felt her own body responding strongly to that.
She smiled nervously and continued to pull him towards herself. She knew her hands would be shaking as she took them off of him. She shifted her hands to either side of his face and guided him to her as she leaned in towards him.
Their lips met a moment later, and she gasped softly as she kissed him. She would have sworn to anyone at that moment that the connection between them felt like an ocean wave had crashed into her. She kissed him for a few moments with her lips pressed against his, and tried to battle the desire to push him back and lay herself on top of him while she also battled the desire to scream with happiness.
He didn't kiss her back at first, he just let himself be kissed. After a few moments he finally started to kiss her back, gently. That seemed to be as far as he was willing to go. His hands weren't roaming her body, and he wasn't trying to do anything more with the kiss. She ignored the demands her body was sending her, and she also ignored her mind's embarrassed pleas to stop. Instead, she parted her lips ever so slightly and kissed him just a little bit more deeply.
It wasn't the kind of kiss one saw in the movies. It wasn't full and passionate with open mouths and writhing bodies. It was soft, and sweet. She put all of the emotions she had for him into the kiss. Everything she still hadn't been able to say to him was in her kiss. It was as far as she could go. She kept her eyes closed, and kissed him in her own way, in the only way she felt she had left to express her feelings to him. He was still kissing her back, but he wasn't taking the initiative. He was only matching what she did.
She smiled softly to herself. She hadn't really expected him to do much else. That was part of what made him special. A few moments later, her mortified sense of embarrassment and social conditioning were starting to reassert themselves inside her. She slowly stopped moving her lips against his, and then slowly pulled her lips back from his. She indulged herself with one tiny little compression of her lips against his lower lip as she withdrew and playfully pulled his lower lip out for a moment before she released him.
She opened her eyes slowly a moment later, and found him sitting in front of her, with his hand still up on her shoulder. He was still leaning with his other hand on the ground, but as she watched he pulled himself back and sat back on his feet again as she smiled shyly at her.
They just looked at each other for several more moments before the silence was finally broken. Surprisingly, it was Ranma who spoke first.
"Akane ... I—" He started to say.
But she held up a hand, and cut him off. She didn't want him to finish that sentence. She was very afraid of how he might finish that sentence. Instead, she surged to her feet and held her hand down to him as she smiled warmly at him. She was pretty sure she knew a few more things about him now than she had just before she'd kissed him. She had done her very best to show him how she felt.
She still, maddeningly, couldn't seem to bring herself to say the words — not to his face anyway. But, it didn't matter anymore. She had left him no room to misunderstand how she felt. He now knew, with one hundred percent certainty, how she felt. It was up to him. She couldn't make his choice for him. She shoved the rest of her thoughts on the subject to the back of her mind, and locked them in a cage where she ignored them. She would go crazy if she dwelled on it.
He took her offered hand, and allowed her to pull him to his feet. He surprised her by stepping forward slightly and resting his hands on her waist. He didn't hug her, or pick her up or anything, and he didn't lean in for another kiss. But just the fact that he had his hands on her said a lot. He wasn't saving her during a fight, he wasn't moving her out of the way of something, he wasn't even touching her just out of casual familiarity. He didn't have a compelling reason to have his hands on her. He clearly just wanted to have the connection with her. She was proud of that. Her efforts to show him that it was safe to approach her since she had given his engagement away ... seemed to be working.
She reached her hand out softly to his cheek, and smiled warmly at him as she stroked the back of her hand down his cheek to his jaw and gently down the side of his neck before she rested her hand on one of his arms. She slid her hand down his arm and rested it on his hand briefly before she shifted her stance and pulled him back towards the house as she grasped his hand as he let go of her. They walked in silence back towards the front of the house.
There was nothing more to say. He had to make his decision now. Her heart was still beating hard in her chest, but she was keeping her nervousness and surging emotions hidden inside again. Her hand was shaking a bit, and she knew he had to be able to feel it, but there wasn't anything she could do about that.
She watched carefully for Nabiki's face as they rounded the corner of the house and came back into Nabiki's line of sight. The joy and relief she saw crossing her older sister's face took her breath away. She darted her eyes to him and saw his eyes light up as well at the sight of Nabiki. His body language changed too. It was very subtle, but he seemed to be unconsciously trying to keep himself facing and leaning towards Nabiki now that her sister was in sight.
She stopped walking. He slowed next to her and looked back at her curiously. She smiled at him and let go of his hand as she made a shooing motion. "Go on, she's waiting for you." She said softly to him. She was pretty sure she knew what was truly in his heart.
Nabiki watched her carefully as she spoke to Ranma, and her older sister's eyes stayed on her until Ranma nodded and turned back around and walked over to Nabiki. Her older sister smiled and leaned into him softly before wrapping her arms around him. Ranma responded to that by hugging Nabiki in return.
She smiled to herself as she pulled in a shaking breath and started walking over to them. It wouldn't be a sad thing if Ranma chose Nabiki. She knew he would be loyal to Nabiki. He would never betray any of them, and Nabiki needed that. She could be his ... friend ... as long as he was good to her sister. Nabiki clearly loved him, she could see it when Nabiki lit up at the sight of him. If he chose Nabiki ... she decided she could be happy for both of them. It wasn't what she wanted, but it wouldn't be the end of the world. She could accept it if Ranma chose Nabiki.
It's time she and I talk.